This is interesting. Email chain between me and a “friend” re the Cheating Ex (I reversed the order so that it’s easier to read, just read straight down):

>>>>> u know that Jaime has a blog that hes using to
>> talk all sorts of crap about u behind ur back, right?
>>>>>

>>>> That’s so none of my business. If he needs to hate me,
>> he hates me. BFD. People who read my site should
>>>> know me well enough to know what really happened.
>> And if they want to hate me with him for camaraderie,
>>>> how does that affect my life, really? They’re not losses to
>> me, they’re not my friends if they don’t get me.

>>> just thought u’d like to know… u want the site?

>> no. I don’t need his bitterness to disrupt my life. I don’t
>> even respond to his calls anymore, I don’t nkow why he
>> would seem to take the hint when I would stop responding to
>> his emails for awhile, then start calling an d txtmsging me
>> again. I really don’t need to deal with whatever’s going on in
>> his head. I don’t have the patience for his i-love-you, i-
>> hate-you head games. Every time I would try to have a normal
>> conversation with him and I think we can salvage a semi-
>> friendship, he proves me wrong. Thsi is all so unnecessary.

> sorry to upset u… just thought u had the right to know…

You didn’t upset me, I appreciate that you’re looking out for me.
Thanks. But really, every time I talk to him it seems like he’s still
trying to work the relatinoship out in his head and the old issues still
abound (on both our parts) and if his conclusion is that he wants to
dwell on things to hate me, then he hates me. The hell am I supposed
to do about it?

Gawd. Maybe this is why I get into unexplained lapses of discomfort. I just don’t understand that guy. It seems like he’s so delusional and feels like such a victim as to the relationship, like when he told me a month ago he was still mad that I “sabotaged our relationship” by taking the initiative in finding out about his lies and cheating and if I had just let him be who he wanted to be and let him do whatever he wanted to do, then we’d still be together. But then I don’t understand why he always picks up contacting me if he’s so mad or has taken up a blog to bitch about me. And then he’d have his employees or other made-up accounts comment 0n my blog. Maybe I should just call him and talk it out. I’m okay with that. If he wants to throw knives, maybe he can throw knives once and for all and it’d bring him to some peace. What I think I’m not okay with, is if he has to keep coming up with reasons to hate me so that he can smother any residual love he has for me, because then the strange contact would not cease, altho that would explain his hot-cold thing that he does with me.

I think I’ll call him now and leave him a voice mail inviting him for a chat when he gets back from Miami. He’s sent me a few text messages from there in the last couple of days, seems like he’s enjoying himself. Hopefully he’ll be in good enough spirits so that he can just hash this out and finally be done with it all. Or maybe he’s already hating me now because i hadn’t responded to his messages and wouldn’t want to hear from me at all. But I really don’t want him so upset that he feels compelled to keep dwelling on it. I actually feel bad that he feels bad still.

Oh, the teeter-totter of it all. Well, I’m gonna make the offer anyway. He can do with it as he sees fit.