Fri 9 Dec 2005
I was off after work to run an errand yesterday, which involved getting bad directions, getting lost, getting stuck in traffic, and fighting angry people (not literally). And that was just in getting there. I’d left the completed errand thinking I got the short end of the stick, but I just checked some sources and it turns out Lady Luck was really smiling down on me when it all went down, unbeknownst to me. Cuz the alternative, which I had chosen against and then bitterly regretted yesterday, turned out upon further examination today to be the worse choice BY FAR. I’m really happy and grateful.
I think I was 16 when I realized that Fate, Providence, my spirit guide, my guardian angel, God, Jesus, whomever is responsible for looking out for me and keeping me straight on my path, knows what they’re doing waaaay more than I do. I’m just blind and dumb stumbling around on Earth, trying to make sense out of something larger than me, for which I don’t have enough information to make sense of. That was when I trusted the higher power completely to arrange things that may not be my choice at the time, but ultimately always turns out better for me than what I would’ve chosen for myself in my ignorance. In other words, if I was upset that I didn’t get my wish, I later found out why and was grateful. At age 16, the issue was something as small as not being able to schedule my classes the way I wanted them so that I could be with the friends I wanted in my classes. But the way fate arranged my classes later proved to be more ideal than I could’ve figured, as more circumstances unfolded over time that would’ve made my personal choices bad for me. The effect of that realization is why even to now, each year I blow out my birthday candles, I don’t wish for anything specific. Instead, I defer the wish to my other-worldly guides to do with it as they see fit.
With the spiritual research I’d done since age 16, I’ve developed a larger understanding of the way things are, and I am completely comfortable with what I have learned, and I see it working every day in small miracles, too perfect and too many to be written off as coincidence.
So for the small blessing yesterday, I am humbled as I am shown once again, that I don’t necessarily know what’s best for me, that the Other Side does, and I am grateful that I am taken care of, even in the smallest of ways. I see You, Lord, and I thank You for always walking with me despite my too-often lapses into Earthly complaints.
Oh. And I also thank You for giving me Diana’s aid in my time of need yesterday. The timing, as with everything, was immaculate.
Amen.
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