You know what I don’t understand? How lighting a match is supposed to magically eat up all the fart and poo stench in the bathroom. I don’t think it works. I think smelling the burnt sulfur mixed into the scent of flatulence just makes everything worse. It says, “My innards stink, I stunk up the place, and my ineffective attempt to cover it acknowledges that I know I stink.”

Okay, but what if you’re on a plane, and you stunk up that little plane lavatory? One passenger tried the ol’ match trick on the plane, too. Long story short, her flatulence LANDED the plane in Nashville, Tennessee. See short article here. And not only did she cause lots of inconvenience and money, she got herself banned from the airline.

This is why you shouldn’t eat broccoli, cauliflower, or dairy before you fly.