Today, Vanessa sent out a mass email trying to entice those weaker-minded of us to join her in a misery-loves-company event. A portion of her email reads:

“The second event I just signed up for is Heart Ridge 1/2 Marathon. It’s 13.1 mile course through rolling hills and fire-roads. Date: September 15th
Let me know if you are game! Sign up soon cuz space fills up quickly!”

After I wiped the tears away from laughing so hard, I figured that what must’ve happened, was that in one of her partied-out half-drunk states, someone on a dare convinced her to sign up for the race online. When she sobered up and saw what she’d done after reading the confirmation email the next day at work and screaming for a few minutes, she decided to trick as many of her friends into running with her as possible, so that she could hang onto us during the race as we drag her across the last miles.

Nice try, Vanessa. But I saw the fine print. I wrote back:
” ‘rolling hills’? Ick! I like flat courses.”

She responded:
“Don’t they make is sound so nice though? Rolling hills, not hilss that will make you want to cry for your mommy!”

That looks like an admission of guilt to me! So she DOES know it’s all a bunch of shananigans! I returned:
” ‘Enjoy the natural scenery and soft wind as you gently round those rolling hills.’
Reality: ‘Gasp fruitlessly for air after holding your breath to keep from sucking in cow stench as you hate life running straight uphill in abandoned countrysides.’ ”

All kidding aside, way to go, Vanessa! I’m so proud of you for setting such amazing goals for yourself, and for being strong and recovering so well. *high-five* Hmm. Maybe I oughta think about joining her.