~ Cindy and Gym Trainee’s Top Picks for Stupidest Bartending Moment This Week ~

There’s always many staggering examples of stupidity to report in each session of bartending that we’ve attended so far, but if I were to list them all, this post would be ridiculously long. So here’s my #1 pick for the week:

At the start of each class, the instructor passes around a sheet of neon-colored self-adhesive address labels. We’re to write our name on a label and stick it on our shirt as a nametag so the instructor knows who he’s looking at. This week, it was bright hot pink.
Toward the middle of class I returned to my desk after doing some pour drills in the bar area, and saw the half-used sheet of neon address labels near my desk. On a white rectangle where a pink label has already been removed, is written “Melissa.” *blink blink* The idiocy hit me fully and dully. “Melissa” had written her name on a white space that no longer contains a hot pink label, and tried to peel it off to stick on herself. I wish so badly that I had a photo of that sheet to post here, because seeing the thing and realizing suddenly what had happened is so much more impactful than my describing it to you!
“Melissa,” by the way, is one of the two unemployed blondie girls who were an hour late to the 1st class, who didn’t buy a day parking pass to put in their cars so the whole class had to wait another half hour for them to get that done so they don’t get towed, and were 20 minutes late returning from break that 1st day. The two girls missed the 2nd week completely, and were again an hour late to this 3rd class.

Gym Trainee’s #1 Pick of the Week:
Our instructor has a rule that if we miss our session that we’re enrolled in (Tuesday evenings), we can make it up by attending the Thursday evening session that week. If we can’t make that, either, we can pop into the Saturday morning or Saturday afternoon session. He teaches the same material in each session each week.
Toward the end of class while he was finishing up his lecture, the instructor said, “I know you’re not obligated to attend more than one session a week to be certified, but the Thursday evening class is only half full. The Thursday class is at the same time as this class, so if you’re not doing anything, you can slide into the Thursday class too, to get some extra practice in for your pouring and mixing. I’m not charging you extra, and it’s to your advantage to come to the Thursday class as well. So who thinks you may want to come in on a Thursday class?”
As a few hands went up, the cop groupie chick asked, “What day’s the class?”
Uh…the Thursday sessions that he teaches on Wednesdays. What did she THINK?!
The cop groupie girl is the same person who did the dumb stuff I mentioned last week, too.

I don’t understand how these people have managed to stay alive this long to be in their 20s. How is it that they didn’t trip one day while walking and chewing gum at the same time, and fall face-first against a moving vehicle?
Gym trainee said to me during break, “I’m glad I’m a girl. So I don’t accidentally date one of them.”

Now I’m having horrible flashes of these girls googling information on bartending or the class, and incidentally landing on my blog and reading this mean-spirited post. The cop groupie chick might sic some of her cop party attendees on me.