Mon 30 Jan 2012
I Don’t Think It’s Getting Better for Me
Posted by cindy under Baby Care , Mental States at 7:04 pm[6] Comments
Went back to my parents’ home for the first time since Allie was born. Some relatives met us there yesterday. I brought Allie to meet Grace’s parents (5 houses up from my parents’, but they’re moving to NorCal soon). All the adults were charmed. She’s charming when she’s out. She smiles, coos, flaps her limbs for the audience. She collected lots of red envelopes, which made me feel guilty. She also napped on her tummy on my parents’ couch for 2.5 hours, then poopied afterwards as I fed her. She was great at her second Gymboree class today, too. She’s not like this at home except for the hour after she wakes up around 8am (during which she charms me with her smiles, singing along to my singing to her with coos).
Mornings are still hard and stressful. Naptimes are worse. I cry nearly every naptime as I can’t get her to stop crying and go to sleep for more than 3 minutes at a time. She’s taking longer and requiring more intervention to go to sleep at night and in her early morning feedings, too. Awareness, I suppose.
Right now Mr. W had put her to sleep on a cushion in the living room on her tummy and they’re napping together. I tried that tummy thing earlier this afternoon and failed and went nearly deaf in a ear as a consequence. I don’t know how to do it. I don’t know how to do anything. Even something I took for granted, breastfeeding, nearly put me to tears in two afternoon feedings as she pulled away after a few sucks and cried “leh.” I have milk, so I don’t know what’s wrong. I’m scared to do the frantic research I did with baby sleep, because that had messed me up so badly, put me in a tailspin, gave me more things to worry about, feel inadequate at accomplishing, confused me with more conflicting theories and tactics.
I’m looking forward to my first psych appointment on Thursday.
If I cried uncle, will Allie hear me?
Okay–remember this is coming from a non-mommy….
Is it super-important that Allie be on such a schedule? It seems to me that she will fall asleep when she’s tired. I know over-tired babies aren’t the most pleasant creatures (I was a nanny for a newborn), but it would sure take some stress off of you trying to stick to a rigid routine.
As for you, my dear…go easy on yourself!! There will be days where you are less tolerant than you might like. Cut yourself some slack. Knowing who you are, it seems like what is bothering you is your inability to control certain situations. Babies are going to be babies. Allie is fine. I’m glad you guys are going to Gymboree to get some constructive playtime. But remember–you already know alot more than you think! Mommies always do 🙂
I hope you can see the humor in having a new “boss” shaping your daily tasks. Things will get easier, but will always remain challenging. Parenting has to be the hardest job in the world. My hat off to you, Cindy. Hang in there 🙂
U used to be a nanny?! Hats off to uuu! (on cell responding from baby’s room where shes taking her morning nap, crossing fingers)
She’s not on a schedule, except for an approximate 8pm bedtime that she doesn’t respect. I just keep her on a 3 hr ish feeding routine that includes some play time & some naptime. Whenever she wakes up for the day, usually betw 7:30a &9a, her day begins. As for naps, I follow her cues. She starts yawning & rubbing her face in my shoulder after she’s been up about an hr, around 9a-10a. I start her soothing process then, walking her, singing softly, & she’ll fall asleep on me. Putting her down is the problem. Same thing at about 2ish &6ish. If I don’t get her to take a good nap at these times, she’ll be overtired & cry. Then shes overstimulated by night & cries instead of sleeps.
I think you missed the spirit of my comment….
No I didn’t; u told me to chill. I wanted to make the point that altho yes, that would be better for me, I’m not THAT rigid. I guess. …i need help.
been there, felt that, went crazy, cried uncle many times. Kid didn’t give a damn, but grew up to be one fine kid now. first 4 months gave me my first grey hair. One thing that helped me was thinking “a mom like me in Iraq must find herself in heaven if her biggest concern is about her child’s sleep habits.” That chilled me out for about a day, and then I got all crazy again.
I love it! I’m going to let that chill me out for the day, too. 🙂