I was chatting with childhood friend Sandy over the weekend about how much we love Trader Joe’s whole organic food products. I’d seen this great jar of marinara sauce at Trader Joe’s, some garlic basil flavor, and had to buy it. Except that after I got it home, I couldn’t get the jar open. So I’d put it back in the cabinet. Every so often, when I’d have a craving for tomato-based pasta, I’d pull out the pot and put it on the stove, dig out the dried pasta and set it on the counter, and pull the jar of marinara out of the cabinet. And I’d struggle and fight with the jar, admit defeat, then put the pot back on the shelf, the pasta and jar back in the cabinets. Sandy suggested some ways to unscrew uncooperative jar lids. “There’s nothing I haven’t already tried!” I explained. “I’ve used a dry dish rag. I’ve used a wet dish rag. I’ve knocked the lid against the counter. I’ve had the jar between my knees as I sat on the ground. I’ve had it between one knee and the carpet. I’ve thrown my entire weight onto the lid. It freaking doesn’t open!”
“What about asking someone for help?”
“I live alone! I’m not gonna walk around outside with a jar of sauce and ask passerbys for help! And I’m not friendly with my neighbors. Besides, if I asked a guy neighbor, he’s gonna think it’s a setup to get him to play hero so I can talk to him.”
“So how often do you take that jar out to try to open it?”
“Oh, like every 3 or 4 months.”
“3 or 4 months? How long have you had it?!”
“Not that long, like a year.”
“A year! So you haven’t had pasta in a year cuz you couldn’t get the jar open? Why don’t you just go buy another jar?”
“Because I already have a jar at home, I’m not gonna buy another one, then I’ll have TWO! I don’t eat that much sauce.”
“But if you can’t open it –”
“But I’m still Asian. I’m not gonna waste something that I already have, or spend money on another one.”
She laughed and said, “Okay, I do understand that. But I just bought a jar of sauce from Trader Joe’s last week, I think it’s even the same tomato basil one, and now I’m wondering if I’M gonna have that problem.”
I said, “Well, now that I know you have the same jar, I’m bringing mine to your house and I’m gonna swap the two when you’re not looking. Then you’ll just think all Trader Joe’s jars are impossible to open. We’ll see how YOU handle it.”