It was freezing last night. My nose got all cold from having to breathe the chilly air so I ended up sleeping with my head all the way inside the covers.

I’ve learned to watch my audience when I complain of cold, though. I’m not just thinking about the people in snowy Minneapolis or sub-zero Chicago rolling their eyes at me (“It’s cold you say? What is it, like SEVENTY over there in Southern California?”), even people in Northern California, like my college roommie Diana, have to put temperature in a separate category for me. Like when I asked her whether our friend Jimmy’s upcoming outdoors wedding in Golden Gate Park, San Francisco is going to be cold. Her reply was, “It’s been sunny and really nice out lately. But yeah, cold for YOU. YOU should bring a warm coat and scarf.”

Is it any wonder my young cousin Mark (with the same quirky family genes as me) who lives in Toronto, Canada would have this IM conversation with me?

Mark: 😀
So it’s snowing out here… and I know you don’t know what that is. It’s basically this white cold solid that comes in flakes. It’s not quite ice but it’s not water either. It’s very annoying to drive on.
Also, it’s quite cold outside.
me: but who MAKES the solid into flakes?
Mark: God?
If you believe in that, otherwise, natural fluctuations in temperature.
me: fluctuations in temperature?
why would the temperature fluctuate?
is there a giant a/c unit outside?
Mark: No no, through natural changes
me: nature doesn’t change!
Mark: yes it does!
everything changes!
me: Okay, I know what’s going on.
Your dad thought it was funny to put all these ideas in your head, liks Santa and Toothfairies and weather changes and stuff.
it’s NOT TRUE.
you’re old enough to know now.
Hey how often does it actually snow where you are?
me: never.
It hailed once when I was 7, and then again when I was like 15, then really briefly again I think I was 22.
Mark: Wowzers
I had a feeling it was perhaps once in every 5-10 years if ever
me: that’s hail, not snow.
Mark: Oh, nevre snows?
hail as in ice pellets?
me: right.
Mark: Well that’s why all you Californians are crazy…
we all know snow is a natural sedative.
a healthy diet includes exposure to 25% snow a year.
I should export some snow to you
me: box it up and mail it on over!