Fri 4 Apr 2008
You guys know my maid of honor, Vicky, right? She called me and told me a story so traumatic for her but so funny for me that I told her she needs a blog. Since she doesn’t have one and doesn’t want to start one, she typed out the story and emailed it to me so that she could make a guest appearance on my blog. So here it is. Main characters are Vicky, her boyfriend Glenn, and her dog, a medium-sized breed of hunting dog called a viszla, Ares:
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There is a giant grassy piece of property with grazing cows on it about 2 miles away from where I live. Ares has been really restless in the house so Glenn and I took him to the massive field yesterday. It looked really nice and serene from afar; rolling green hills, a winding dirt path, and the occasional small herd of cows. I imagined myself as Julie Andrews in the Sound of Music.
When we got to the field Ares immediately ran off. He ran as fast as he could up and down the dirt path. He pranced and bounced through the tall grass & flowers like a gazelle. He even got to see a herd of cows for the first time. He would look at the cows and then look back at me with his head tilted to one side as if saying, “I’m really confused… what are those things?” Glenn, the dog, and I walked around the field for some time. It was really a great way to end the day. The sun was setting though and the sky was a warm red. It was time to go home.
We started heading back to the car when all of a sudden Ares disappeared into a tall patch of grass. We called him to us but he wouldn’t come over. All we saw was his tail in the air; he was hunched over, sniffing something in the ground. As a dog owner, when you see your dog sniffing something in tall grass you immediately panic. What if he found a snake hole? What if he’s eating something he’s not supposed to? I started yelling for him at the top of my lungs. “Ares! Get over here! Ares! Ares!” He finally looked up and ran over to us. Something didn’t look right about him though…
Ares bolted past us and I grabbed onto his collar. I immediately felt a slimy goo all over my hand. I got him to sit down and took a good look at what he did. He was covered in fresh, green, slimy cow poop! He rolled in it so much that it covered his left eye and it found its way into his ear canal. He was covered in it. The entire left side of his body was one big poopy mess. All I saw was a yellow-greenish slime of chewed blades of grass. I thought I was going to throw up. Glenn tried to consol me [by reminding me that cows are vegetarian and] saying, “It’s alright; it’s just mushed up grass!” I didn’t care. This green slime digested through four cow stomachs and exited from a cow’s butt. Nothing could make this okay.
Glenn leashed him up and we took him to a neighbor’s front yard to get hosed off. I wasn’t going to let this disgusting mess into my car! We went home and washed him a couple of times but he still smells like cow. Needless to say we won’t be going back to the field anytime soon.
Why do dogs do this? Is Ares just really retarded or is this something most dogs would do?
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“Green slime that digested through four cow stomachs and exited from a cow’s butt”!! HAHAHA, she kills me. That’s what you get for naming a dog after the Greek god of savage warfare. By the way, this is mostly an indoor dog who cuddles with her in bed in the mornings…
every single puppy i’ve had so far has rolled around in his own poo. as a puppy, they just don’t know any better and they don’t take particular offense to the smell of poo. eventually (well, hopefully eventually), they learn that this is not desirable behavior and they grow out of it.
but maybe because this is new poo, they just don’t know any better.
I know that dogs like to eat cat poo because to them, it’s a source of protein that dogs instinctively feel they need. But there’s no protein in cow poo. Unless processed grass has protein. I wonder if Ares was EATING the cow poo because he instinctively felt he needed fiber.
“new poo.” HAHAHAHAHA!!
Sooo… my story….
I have two labrador retrievers, and living on a farm, there are a lot of empty fields around me as well. People have called it the world’s largest doggie bathroom. This, ironically, is besides the point…
So one day, I’m out walking the dogs, and they too love to bolt throught the grass and bounce like “gazelles”, and it’s normal for them to dig for gophers, chase the jack rabbits, and create general mischief.
But this one time, I noticed something really wierd, the boy dog, maybe about 500 yards away, was jumping in the air, with a half twist, and body slamming his back to the ground. THAT IS CRAZY AND WIERD! Why the heck is the dumb dog body slamming himself as if he were in the WWF, i thought? The dog got tremendous air, I should add, as this was art in motion. He kept doing this over and over again, until I called out to him. He looked at me with a bit of glee, but….
I thought he had caught a gopher (which he has in the past) but no, to my shock, when I rode up on my bike… he’s covered in this brown goop, which I immediately threw my bike in between me and my dog. And when the foulest smell came over me, I immediately yelled BAD DOG, BAAAD DOOOOG! and tried to kick him, to keep his distance between me and him!
I have no idea how, but the location of this spot was close to the street and behind a tree, and someone must have diarrhea-ed, and ran behind this tree and took a massive dump there! I rode back, with my dog in (long) tow, leashed him to a pole on the farm, and hosed him off with the garden hose (for a long time). He didn’t like it one bit, but I really hoped he learned his lesson!
dogs are crazy, but they are fiercely loyal…
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! *whistle*
Ok… I am really, REALLY happy I have kitties! I don’t recall my old lab rolling in crap, but she did try to eat it when we visited my scholl’s farm. Pigs have a chemical in their crap that sticks with you and I almost had a heart attack when my dog went for a bee line towards the poop. Thank goodness for leashes to stop such behavior!!!
LOL
So…the real answer lies in natural instinct. Dogs will roll around in stuff that smells bad to hide their own odor. This stems from their wild dog heritage where it was necessary to mask their own smell to keep from being detected by prey animals. Wolves and other wild dogs still do this.
So to avoid detection by carnivorous predators, a dog will roll around in cow poo, thus making himself smell instead like filet mignon? Great instinct. haha!