There was an article in a local Las Vegas newspaper that gives an in-depth look of how the prostitution “industry” in the area has been impacted by the plummeting economy. Normally during downturned economic times, the porn, gambling, drinking, and prostitution businesses increase as people turn to them as an escape. But THIS time, the porn industry took a 20%-30% decline in sales, AND mid-range prostitutes have had to add sex acts that they’d previously forbidden, AND lower their rates. (What is this world COMING to?!) Based on an interview of a mid-range prostitute, she used to charge $450 per date, and now has had to drop her rates to $300 per date, and make available things she previously would refuse to do for fear of losing more customers to the competition who WOULD do those acts and charge less, too. Despite that, her personal economics have suffered 50%, she claims, because used to make $6K a week and she’d save $1000 a week and spend the rest, but now she’s no longer able to put away the weekly $1K savings.

So at this point I’m going, “I don’t have $5K of expenses a week! If I had her job, I’d be filthy rich in a few months!” And I had to kick myself mentally.

The reporter then interviews a high-level call-girl and it turns out, she says the high-level people haven’t been impacted by the economy at all, because the wealthy clients who pay $2000 an hour STILL have enough money to keep paying $2000 an hour.

And then I wondered, what qualifies a girl into the high-level hooker classification? The interviewee is a former finance director. So I assume she’s smart. Maybe when one’s clientele are dignitaries, they really want an “escort” on their arm who could pull off the upper crust mingling, the political savvy and social refine to appear like, “I’m not a hooker. I’m Mr. Foreign Dignitary’s intelligent, rich and well-connected date and I just so happen to be extremely hot and unfathomably attracted to him.” And I thought, “I can act.” So I had to kick myself again.

The article’s interviews with lower-level prostitutes reveal that the typically substance-addicted bottom-dwellers of the profession’s heirarchy aren’t negatively impacted by the economy, either. They still get their usual $200-$300 a pop (har) rate, and business goes on as usual. It seems that a concern of the writer is that when mid-range prostitutes drop their rates to the area of low-range prostitutes, they also expose themselves to (har) a lower, scummier clientele base. This, coupled with the addition of sex acts that they really don’t want to do, make for an unpleasant career experience. The writer recommends that instead of compromising themselves ( :/ ), mid-range hookers should advertise more broadly and creatively, such as going online, placing internet ads, and starting online blogs.

And here again I think, this time aloud, “I already have a blog. How easy would it be for me to just convert into prostitution?” I received a snort from Mr. W.