Mon 12 Jul 2010
No Pain, No Gain
Posted by cindy under Fertility , Goals , Health & Body , Mental States at 7:44 pm[9] Comments
I’m getting a LOT of feedback, opinions, attempts at persuasion, warnings, all attempting to discourage me from my decision to not use an epidural during childbirth. This advice comes from friends who are mothers and a couple are even nurses with delivery room experience, so I believe them and I know they absolutely know what they’re talking about, and the warnings are given in love and concern for me. However, my refusal to consider an epidural is also made in love and concern — for my unborn, as yet nonexistent-on-this-plane kid. Studies show that the IQs of children born without the use of an epidural are higher than those of kids whose mothers used the drug, and the natural newborns are more responsive during the Moro Reflex Test given upon birth, whereas epidural babies act kinda doped up. I don’t know for a fact that these studies are 100% conclusive or that there is a guaranteed correlation or causation relationship, but if there’s a chance I can give my child an edge in life by just suffering through some pain at childbirth, I can not imagine not doing it. My experienced friends tell me that they greatly appreciated their epidurals and didn’t know how people could go through childbirth without it. I had responded that there are mothers through time who worked on the fields or farms until their water broke, they went aside to push out their kid, and they returned to whatever they were doing as soon as the kid was bathed and fed. But that’s not the life I’m subject to, they reason with me, I don’t have to go through that because I’m in a position where modern medicine and painkillers are available to me. I don’t fault their logic, but I’m all the more determined to do this the way I’d intended. I realize I’m the ignorant one here, but if that ignorance and lack of experience is gonna carry me through, I’m gonna hold on to that ignorance until my own experience forces the light of knowledge on me. But here’s what I know…I know I will be fine. I know it will be pain beyond my wildest imagination, but it will be over soon, and I will know for the rest of my life that I did everything within my control to give this child what I could from the moment of birth, no matter the pain to me. What’s some screaming at childbirth compared to the rest of his/her life?
Besides, I could hold this over the kid’s head when (s)he acts up.
It’s your body, your child, and your life. Do what you want. If you don’t feel you should have an epidural, then don’t. It’s good you have found enough reason to NOT take the block. Remember, no one will call you a weenie if you are rushing to the hospital and decide to get one. ha
i can hear the conversation already…
cindy: “do you even appreciate the pain and suffering that i endured to bring you into this world???!!!”
18 month old kid: “whatever, mom. that was your choice to make things harder on yourself than they had to be, you dumbass.”
i have two close friends who experienced natural childbirth, though not by choice. they were only minutes away from delivering when they arrived at the hospital. i think that’s the key =P (that’s what i was hoping for, for myself, but it didn’t work out that way.)
all that said, plan for whatever kind of delivery you want, BUT keep an open mind. if you have to deviate from your birth plan for whatever reason, don’t beat yourself up about it.
good luck =)
oh, and don’t tell my kid about the IQ thing. if he ends up being a dummy, i don’t want him to blame me for being wimpy =P
Flat Coke – I’m kinda counting on that, which is why I’m making public declarations now that I don’t intend to use an epidural. Maybe I’ll remember this and will be shamed into keeping my promise when I’m out of my mind in pain.
flip flop girl – HAHAHAHA! I’d be so pissed if my 18-mo-old uses his/her extra IQ to be a smart-ass to me. Watch me chase after my kid with an epidural needle.
If Kyden finds “his” blog and follows the links to this blog, you’d have bigger problems than his thinking you shaved a few IQ points off his development. Altho I think Logan would have more to be offended by. haha!
i’m bookmarking this blog entry and we’re going to re-visit it after you give birth to a child. =P
Hi Cindy,
I gave birth last year without epidural (i had painkiller drips but very little, as I did it all in 1 hr. I think the key to my success was that I rented a fetal heart monitor and labored on my own at home until my water broke. By the time I got to the hospital, I was already 8 (10 = ready to push if you know what i mean). Once they strapped me down at the hospital, that was when I felt the worst, because when you’re in labor pain, you really want to be able to move around, not strapped to a bed. Ask your hospital and OB about labor options to see if you can still move around up until the moment you are ready to push or do they strap you in right away. It’s great that you are in LA, much more options than where I gave birth.
wilco – okay. knowing that, it’ll help me keep my resolve.
idlehouse – awww, congratulations! flip flop girl had also told me that it seems the “key” is to wait till it’s too late for them to give you an epidural by the time you get to the hospital. I read up on all the studies about what the risks of epidurals are during labor, and subsequently on both mother and child. It just does NOT seem worth it. Why did you choose to go without? Or was it unplanned?
And strapped to a bed? Wow, never even occurred to me. I will definitely look into that, thanks!
hi Cindy,
My mom gave birth to 8, all natural, and my grandma, at least 9, so i figured the women in my family can do it. I didn’t want to push anything into my baby’s system at birth, so i indicated in my birthplan that i wanted to avoid epi. i asked for stadol because i was running on little food, 2 hrs of sleep at that point, and wanted to conserve my energy to push the baby out. next time, i will skip the stadol as well.
oh, and i also read that epi interferes w/ labor and increases your chance of getting a c-section. from my own observation, most of my cohorts who got epi last yr ended up w/ c-section. i said most because 2 pp have not had time to write about their birth so i dont know how they delivered
A lot of women have given birth naturally. I’m thinking, “I’m not worse than you!” haha. I read the same thing on epidurals interfering with vaginal labor. It’s kinda hard to push when you can’t feel anything waist-down. It prolongs labor for that reason, too. Did you see the increased risk of infection? I think that happened to my cousin. I’m gonna try to be healthy and fit (cuz Flip Flop Girl said that contributes greatly to a successful labor experience) and say no to drugs. 🙂