I had some long conversations with the stepkidlet yesterday. She’s devastated right now; after 6 months, Beau broke up with her last week because he feels that his attraction to and desire for her is a “sin” so despite the fact that they never did more, and never intended on doing more, than hold hands and have the occasional kiss (sometimes that would cause him to have a “sinful thought” and he’d immediately pull away from her, claim he’s “fallen” and immediately get on his knees and pray), despite the fact that 90% of their activity together involves religion (going to various churches, reading and discussing the Bible together, praying, singing worship songs, writing each other loving God-centered letters), he has decided that they need to not be together because if their flesh is weak and they desire each other, they should concentrate solely on Jesus right now. Uh, hello. Jesus has brought you someone like-minded with whom you can have a Christian life and future, and you throw that away because you’re attracted to her? Talk about looking a gift horse in the mouth.

Anyway, somehow this conversation led to me talking about a friend’s mom’s faith and how this mom clings to prayer as her sole acceptable answer to anything “wrong” in life. This woman found religion fairly late in life and is an avid believer. As her health slowly fails, instead of taking her doctor’s and family’s advice to eat better, get some exercise, help herself strengthen her body, she has told her family that she will just pray on it and if Jesus sees fit to heal her, He will. So she does nothing. I think she’s taking her religion so far as to use it as an excuse for crippling inaction at this point, and I had crossly said to my friend, “How is your mom so sure that the answer to her prayers isn’t her son researching and sending her advice on what superfoods to consume to heal her body?” It didn’t matter; her response to her son giving her information on studies and nutrition is always, she won’t do anything affirmative for herself except pray, and Jesus will save her. I kinda thought Beau had this mentality; instead of working on what he feels is a weakness toward temptation, instead of acknowledging that the two of them are doing so well in this relationship despite his perceived sinful temptations, he was just going to run away, break Stepdaughter’s heart, and “work solely on his relationship with Jesus” away from her, and pray for strength. Where the “sin” comes in is that he desires someone who is not his wife. Given this mentality, the only way he could get married sinlessly is if he married someone he were completely unattracted to, or if it were an arranged marriage — good luck with the chemistry post-marriage. I told Stepdaughter briefly about my friend’s mom, and she in turn told me this story.

A man’s raft collapsed in the middle of the ocean and he was treading water, praying fervently for Jesus to rescue him. A tugboat comes by and some men yell over the side, “Do you need help? We can throw you a lifesaver and pull you in.”
The man said, “No thanks, I’m praying to Jesus to save me.” So the tugboat went on its way.
Later, a cruiseship passed by and the crew yelled over to the man, “Are you okay? We’ll lower a lifeboat for you to climb aboard.”
The man said, “That’s okay, I’m praying to Jesus to save me.” So the cruiseship left.
Next, a helicopter came over him and shone a light down, and a man says over the loudspeaker, “Sir, we will throw down a ropeladder for you to hold onto so we can airlift you to shore!”
The man said, “That won’t be necessary, I’ve been praying to Jesus and He will save me.” So the helicopter flew away.
The man soon tired and drowned. Upon his spirit’s arrival to heaven, he went to Jesus and said, “Father, I prayed and I prayed! Why did you forsake me?”
Jesus said, “Are you kidding? I sent you a tugboat, a cruiseship, AND a helicopter, and you refused them all!”

God answers prayers in ways man may not expect. Doesn’t mean you should squander the gifts around you.