I need to stop being so paranoid. Either I’m still traumatized by Susanne, or, God forbid, I’m sensing something.

Each time I see I missed Nanny Laura’s call, I’d call voice mail to check her message, my heart pounding, praying she wouldn’t be telling me she’s not going to be able to nanny for us, after all. Of course, it’s never been that. And now she’s started using text messaging, which is great and convenient, but I have the same reaction. Like, yesterday…
*seeing a text message from Laura* *freaking out* *pushing the “read” button, terrified*
“How’s your little sweety? So exited to get to know her better.”
*relieved*
And then just now.
“Need you to know that –“
*freaking out already* *brain completing her sentence with stuff like “…I’m no longer able to be your nanny because…”
“– I have an appointment on Mon –“
*brain completing her sentence with stuff like “…for another job interview that I’m seriously considering…”
“– and won’t be available until about noon. Will you want me to come over then or wait until Tues?”
Whew.
I wrote back, “Sure, noonish is fine. The more time allie spends with u while I’m there, the better, so she knows us ‘together.'”
“Absolutely. So looking forward to it.”
“Me too! Also looking forward to getting to know my new friend laura better.” A grownup to talk to on Monday! All afternoon! Yay! And someone can bottlefeed Allie for me while I pump! Double-yay! (The things I don’t take for granted anymore…)
“So sweet. :)”