A major flaw with people, or with myself more specifically, is that bad stuff could drop me 10 notches whereas good stuff largely go by unnoticed. I think it’s also a woman thing to fixate on a negative thing or flaw, cuz we want so badly to fix it or to will it into oblivion. Nag it into oblivion, for some. But I like to try to notice the good stuff, stop myself from dismissing it, and give the good the proper weight it deserves.

I was having that crappy evening yesterday, and then I called Mr. W, who proved why he’s worthy of my dedicating the rest of my life to. Even though I didn’t tell him much except that I was in a foul mood, he was nice about it, didn’t pry, and said with a smile in his voice that I need to get my nightly dose of comedy. I realized then that I hadn’t had the TV on all evening, which is a rarity for me. But by the lateness of the hour, I’d already missed my favorite sit com of Two and a Half Men, and Friends and Will and Grace wouldn’t be on for another hour or so. There was a little silence, and then he did the closest thing he could to giving me my show: he sang the theme song of Two and a Half Men to me. “Men men men men, manly men men men…” I laughed and felt better instantly.

After we hung up cuz it was past Mr. W’s bedtime, I got online and saw that James was on. I IMed him and we chatted online for a bit, when I realized I’d forgotten to eat dinner and had only a smoothie for lunch. I did have birthday cake for breakfast, though. James said that if I wanted to go out and grab a bite, that he would pause his work and keep me company. “I could use a beer,” he said. I’d been wanting to hang out for days, but Dwaine’s been MIA so I’d just been moping at home. James and I hadn’t seen each other forever; he’d gotten busy picking up a contracted job on top of his regular job, I got busy with random stuff and stopped Zaino-ing my car, and hence went our regular contact. We looked online for nearby restaurant-bars open late, and decided on BJ’s. I got there first, and waited for James at the bar.

I hadn’t sat by myself at a bar during late night for a long time. I’d forgotten about the regulars, the drunks, the overly-dressy women, who hang there at weeknights hoping to catch some male attention. I remember Sandy saying that it’s pretty sad when we see women all decked out to go to a restaurant bar cuz that means this is the highlight of their social life. I had thrown on a fitted t-shirt and shorts and despite being seriously underdressed for the ridiculous crowd, still turned a few male heads. When James showed up, we had a nice chat over a thin-crust appetizer pizza (me), glass of Framboise Lambic (me) which is a raspberry ale off tap, and he had a Hefeweizen off tap. And then he ordered and we split a Pizookie, BJ’s specialty giant cookie fresh-baked into a tin and topped with vanilla bean ice cream. James told me that he’d thought about me recently in a personal problem he’d encountered, and remembered what I’d told him some time ago about how to address and resolve uncomfortable issues. He said he was going to let it fester and go, but actually evaluated the situation from the perspective I’d shown him before, and he addressed it the way that, according to him, I’d “taught” him. And it completely worked out and appears to have resolved everything. It was really nice of him to give me credit for an interpersonal success he’d accomplished, and I felt special that something I’d said to him or demonstrated on him before had been taken seriously, remembered, and adopted.

Definitely much better than feeling sensitive about some lame 4 minute phone call.