cindy's world

We had a great time at the class! I was right about a few things:
* The instructor looked JUST like how I dreamt he’d look, plus about 10 pounds. Even the salt-n-pepper goatee! He was funny and jovial and friendly, just like you’d expect a bartender to be. I would’ve done better in Geometry if a bartender had taught it.
* He talked about prohibition and moonshine, but thankfully, only in passing. (His point was that making things illegal, more specifically weed, makes it dangerous for the consumers cuz they find alternative deathly versions of it. And then he quickly went on to say that he didn’t mean to advocate drugs, he was just making a point.)
* The 1st class wasn’t hands-on playing with liquids, it was more introductory and lecture.

The class is taught by a very experienced instructor of bartending, and he teaches not just drinks, but also educates us on alcohol and safe consumption, checking for fake IDs, law on responsible alcohol service. It’s stuff that people don’t get through just in-service training, and things that are soon going to become a legal requirement (like CPR for personal trainers), so it’ll make us more marketable that we’re certified by this class after it’s over. I guess this program is one of very few official certified classes that are approved by some agency or other.

Yesterday we got a ton of recipe cards, an instructional manual/workbook, and a DVD. We went around the room of 11 students and introduced ourselves. There was a quiet loner guy, a giggly friendly couple (the girlfriend just turned 21 the day before class and both of them were still hung over), two young unemployed blondie girl friends who were late coming to class and late coming back from break, two other girl friends who either currently or used to work in restaurants, an overeducated and now out-of-work mortgage loan agent girl, a cop groupie who said her reason for taking the class was because she goes to a lot of cop parties and now she wants to work in them. And then there was me and gym trainee.

Some of the more interesting things we did in class (which brand new classroom had a restaurant-sized bar and expansive 2nd story view of the campus pool) was put on “drunk goggles” which simulate .16 blood alcohol level, .24 BAC, and .32 BAC, and try to do some DUI field sobriety tests in the classroom. I did okay with the .16 BAC goggles but did stumble initially. And then we looked at a ton of confiscated fake IDs. Some are really good, and others are so poor that you wonder what moron would pay good money for something that pathetic. At least, I wondered until I realized hey, that moron’s photo is RIGHT THERE! Idiot. We also learned some sneaky ways to question the ID-giver if we don’t think it’s his/her real ID. We also looked at our own IDs and credit cards under a blacklight, and DID YOU KNOW that imprints of the CA flag appears as if by magic on a CA driver’s license under blacklight?! I had no idea! You could see the red bars and brown bear and everything! (The instructor said his wife takes the blacklight to hotels w/them, and the class went “ewww” and then he gave us a tip to not touch the TV remote controls, and then there were bigger “EWWWWW”s.) The instructor also demonstrated usage of an ID scanner which reads a legitimate ID and displays the name and age of the person if it’s real, “expired” if it’s expired, and nothing if it’s a fake.

OOH, OOH, AND THE BEST PART!! The homework project due by the end of the course is to GO TO A BAR that we’d like to work at and sit and observe the bartender, and bring back observations on their work, such as how they do their pours (long or short) and how they interact with customers, whether they’re good on customer service, how they handle drunks or whether they’re responsible about cutting people off. He said we can go to bars several times, or to go multiple bars, but to research at least for a few hours total. He said to be responsible about our drinking and to not get toasted while on assignment, but still! What class gives an assignment to go hang out at a bar?! I know you’re all jealous.

The instructor said that the future classes will be hands-on barwork, and the nights will be themed. Next week’s theme: tequila drinks! “We don’t use fake milk or fake mixers or no-name sodas in here,” he said. “We don’t use actual alcohol, but the rest of the stuff is real and you’ll all get all the soft drinks you want.” Kinda makes me want to start drinking sodas again. It’s that Asian gene: “It’s FREE? Then I have to have it.”

If you’re interested in more information about his class, the instructor also has a personal business website at bartendingexperience.com.

This evening after work, I’ll be attending my first bartending class at a local college. Woohoo, four and a half hours of playing with colored water and bottle-spinning! Unless the first day is full of lectures about the historical origin of alcohol, the period of prohibition in the old South, and the molecular chemical breakdown of ethyl. That would not be fun. I remember in high school, for a full period of German class, our teacher Mr. Englyng (Dwaine and I now have a phone # and address, but we have yet to call him) talked about the beer making process and hops and fermentation, complete with diagrams drawn on the whiteboard. Sure, beer is a part of German culture and the discussion was held in the German language, but I learned very little. Mr. Englyng even remarked toward the end of that period that I was quiet that day. Yeah, no kidding! What do I have to contribute in a beer discussion?!

I told my judge yesterday that I would be leaving early to take a bartending class every Tuesday this month. He was surprised, but said, “I think you’ll be great at it!” He said there’s something about an occupation that entails physical exertion that makes you feel like you’ve put in a good day’s work, things like being on your feet all day during bartending and like his old college job of working for a moving company, loading heavy furniture into a moving van. “I think you’d be making money hand-over-fist,” he continued, then paused. “I’m afraid you’d be making so much money, however, that you may leave me.” I reassured him that he has nothing to worry about as I can’t even tell my parents about the bartending class and possible future gig. I can see it now:

Mom: WHAT?! You had a REAL job and now you’re serving DRINKS to people? You did not go to college to serve alcohol!
Me: Well technically, I did…

Eh well, it’s just 5 weeks, not much of a life investment to open a new door. And we do come out of the class certified.

I did a test drive from work to the college yesterday, and the drive SUCKED. There’s construction on the main street that the campus is on, reducing the 3-laned road to a single lane in both directions. I also didn’t buy campus parking, so I’m a little afraid that my car’s gonna get jacked parked on a street somewhere. We’ll see how it goes.