cindy's world

Maxim, the premiere junk magazine for men, has recently published a Top 5 list of women. But unlike other pop magazine lists, the women who made the top 5 are the current MOST UNSEXY WOMEN, in Maxim’s educated opinion. And the winners are…

5. Britney Spears
(Ouch! Sure she’s nowhere near her previous “Slave 4 U” rocking legs and body half-nekkid onstage dancing pre-babies self, but even in her heavily criticized recent MTV Music Awards bikini, she had an hourglassy figure, her stomach didn’t jiggle when she jumped around, and I didn’t see any stretch marks. Her body still kicks my never-pregnant body’s ass.)
4. Madonna
(She’s a bit manly for me, but I’m not sure what this is about since she’d mainly stayed out of the public eye for awhile — did she lose points for all the baby adoption back-and-forths? If that’s it, then geez, it’s not like she’s angelina freakin-jolie.)
3. Sandra Oh
(I have to agree with this. I get that she’s a great actress and is making her mark for Asian Americans in popular media, but can they find an uglier Asian chick to represent us? For some reason, there are a lot of non-Asian people who think she’s just gorgeous, but every Asian I know, and among people who are familiar with Asians in general, think she’s just awful on the eyes.)
2. Amy Winehouse. Weinhaus? Whinehouse?
(I have never heard of this person, but apparently she’s a talented musician who’s always getting crap for being physically unattractive. I’d look her up if I knew how to spell her last name.)
1. Sarah Jessica Parker
(WHOOP WHOOP! Take THAT, SATC! I hate that show. I consequently and unreasonably hate all people who act on it. I don’t get what all the hype over SJP is about. Okay, she’s skinny [emaciated], she’s got boobs and legs and maybe even an ass, but that wirey big hair and fuschia streak of blush up her cheeks? Ick! They also dress her character horribly on SATC. Adam Carolla [previously of KROQ’s “Lovelines”, TV’s “The Man Show” and current KFI Talk Radio’s “The Adam Carolla Show”] refers to her as “one of those women that YOU women love and want US to love or find attractive, and we just DON’T.” Right there with you, Adam. I don’t, either.)

End catty rant.

I’m open-minded to change. Doesn’t mean I’m not surprised by it. Which is why I’m surprised that my work trainee totally redeemed herself the day and a half following my last post. (I only get her 2 days, yesterday and today.)

I’d written that last post at noon, and it seems that at lunch, my trainee did some thinking and came back a different person. I had her swear all the witnesses yesterday afternoon and today, which she did without referring to her oath cards (which she probably didn’t have on her anyway), and the oaths went smoothly, including her directions telling them to be seated, state and spell their first and last names for the record, etc. This morning, she returned my notepad and showed me she’d brought her own, so she was prepared today. Despite her feeling mentally unprepared to take over our big ugly messy trial by herself (so I didn’t force her to), she did everything else I told her to — took correct notes, did the minute order, corrected the things I asked her to, filled out the exhibit labels, etc. And as for attitude, there was none.

She handed me her evaluation for me as a trainer (I was surprised I was even allowed to see it before she turned it in to a supervisor, but *shrug*), and then had the balls to say, “Thank you so much for these two days. I learned a lot. I’m sorry we started off on the wrong foot, but I’m happy we got past that and I want you to know I appreciate everything you showed me.” Gah. I smiled and said something about being glad she was cool about our tiff yesterday morning, and then she left for the day.

Her evaluation for me rated everything, on a scale of 1 (not at all) to 5 (very much s0), 5s across the board for being well-informed and explaining the job, for exhibiting work skills she felt she should pattern after, for being available or giving a resource when she felt in doubt, for allowing her to observe and then perform courtroom tasks. In the comment section, that requests her to write both positive and negative experiences, she wrote:

Positive part of this experience was finally getting to sit in on a trial. Negative part was that I came in mid trial and was unable to view a trial from beginning to end. Cindy is a great trainer, she gave me information that will definitely help during my training.

So I marked her “Acceptable” (as opposed to “Unacceptable”, my only other option) on all categories being evaluated. Here’s my attempt at honesty in back-handed compliments:

1. PRODUCTIVITY:
No calendar these days, but trainee did an extensive trial minute order on day 2 using her own notes, with minimal significant corrections. Minute order was completed before day’s end.
2. QUALITY OF WORK:
Day 2, trainee completed exhibit labels accurately and neatly. Trial notes are legible and complete.
3. WORK HABITS:
Trainee stayed late the evening of Day 1 to finish training. Very receptive to instructions and direction, but is honest in advising me when she’s not ready for a task (e.g. doing Day 1’s minute order or taking over courtroom prematurely at Day 2).
4. APPLICATION TO DUTIES:
Asks good questions to heighten her understanding of court proceedings (and computer system) and applies her learning immediately to her work.
5. ADAPTABILITY:
(no comment)
6. COURTROOM DEMEANOR:
(no comment)
7. ADMINISTRATION OF OATHS OR AFFIRMATIONS:
Despite not being prepared with her oath cards on Day 1, trainee nevertheless administered oaths to various witnesses from memory, even with stage direction, clearly and authoritatively.

BEFORE you all call me a wuss, lemme first tell you that in addition to the fact that she put in 100% today, lost the attitude, and apologized about yesterday morning, I also got this email from my supervisor today:

[Trainer 3] and Cindy,
enclosed are the instructions and Evaluation forms. Please get an eval to me either separately or jointly by Friday in the morning. I will go over it with the trainee that afternoon.

Thanks for training.
[supervisor]

I emailed back:

My understanding was that the trainee would not see our evaluations?

He replied:

No, it will be discussed with her on Friday. You can opt not to be in the room at the time. Your presence is welcome.

Gah! I can write a bunch of shit and not be there to deal with it, but then I also won’t be there to defend myself if her answer to my evaluation is, “She’s a psychotic bitch and has hated me right from the start for no reason. In fact, I think she’s racist.” My supervisor followed up his email reply to me with a phone call asking if I think she may not pass, because if it’s as serious as a no-pass grade, he and I can talk about it first. I told him no, it’s probably not that serious, I’m not comfortable being the one to determine whether someone passes or fails based on 2 days with me so I’ll just write my evaluation honestly and let the supervisors decide whether they want to delve deeper into it with me or the trainee.

I walked off the elevator this morning toward my courtroom and bumped into my supervisor. “Well HELLO!” he said in mock sarcastic joy. “ConGRATULATIONS! You have a trainee.” I walked in and so I did. =P

I set up all my stuff, and then turned to her (who was seated too far away, really) whether she knew anything about jury trials. She said, “A little bit.” So I told her we’ll just start with her taking notes in our trial today and we’ll compare notes at the end of the day so I can see if she’s noting the right things and picking up on the important things in trial that will need to go into her minute orders. She agreed, but just sat there. “Do you have a notepad?” I asked her. “Not today,” she said. Who doesn’t bring a notepad to an on-the-job training? But I got a notepad and had to walk it over to her as she seemed content to just sit there and let me keep getting up and handing her stuff or to talk to her.

A few minutes later, I got up and walked to her again (as court was in full session and I had to whisper) and asked her whether she knew her oaths. I know from my training classes that I had to memorize all my different oaths and recite them on command from the instructors. She said, “I don’t have my oath cards on me today.” She was dependent on note cards for her oaths? We were told that you needed to know them when you hit a courtroom. They stressed this over and over, that they’d fail you immediately if you didn’t have your oaths down. And who goes to on-the-job training without their oaths on-hand? So I asked her whether she had memorized her oaths in classroom training. She got defensive and said, “YES I learned my oaths in class and I PASSED my oaths but on a daily basis I am not required to HAVE my oaths — ” She was wrong, but I cut her off and hissed in a loud whisper, “You don’t have to get defensive on me. I’m just trying to see if you know your oaths because if you do I’m going to have you swear in the witnesses in our trial today. I’m not accusing you of anything, I’m not trying to make you defensive, I’m just trying to see what you know from class because I don’t know whether they’ve changed the class.” Jeebus! She backed off and said, “No, that’s fine, they didn’t change the class. I can swear in the witnesses.” I was TICKED.

She did chill after that and at breaks and during sidebars, I was able to bring her copies of forms to explain them to her, bring her the trial file and go over it with her, basically I had to bring everything to her, kneel by her on the ground and point things out. She never moved her fat ass out of the chair. But I’d rather do that than to have her breathing down my throat in my desk area, so I didn’t tell her to move closer. She told me she had a doctor’s appointment she’d leave for at 11:45a, and I said that’s fine. And then it started looking like a new witness was going to come in before lunch. I told her she can swear in that witness, and she cut me off with, “Well actually, I was gonna tell you that I’m going to leave at 11:30 instead. And they’re going to finish up with this witness first before the new witness.” Fine. Whatever. She was still sitting there at 11:26ish when our witness concluded early and the new witness was walking in. I turned to her and told her she can swear in this witness before she had to leave, and she stood and said, “I’m just going to leave now,” and left.

And then later another clerk emailed me to tell me the trainee told her I was rude to her and told her to just take notes all day.

Is she AWARE that I am going to write her training evaluation?!

…that people were protesting Columbus Day parades with violent bloody demonstrations, i.e. pouring fake blood all over paraders and stuff, cuz they’re saying Columbus was also a slave trader so he shouldn’t be celebrated? Slavery in today’s official opinion was a very bad thing, but it was not illegal back in the day which, yes, was a horrific unfortunate thing, but I don’t understand how you can protest 500-year-old history. How far back do we get to go? Do I get to protest the way the US turned its back on Chinese immigrants after they blew us up on the railroad construction? On Japan taking over Taiwan in my grandparents’ generation? On the Communists overthrowing the Republic government in China? On the invasion of the Mongols on the Great Wall back in Qin Dynasty? On predatory birds, dinosaurs and stuff that had stomped on or eaten my pre-human ancestors? What does protesting history accomplish? I bet the protestors are enjoying their day off today on Columbus Day anyway. (Or maybe I’m not getting the full story of what their issues are.)

…that some of you guys have to work? I’m sorry. I got up about half an hour ago and I’m going into the living room to continue watching DVD episodes of “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” with my fiance now. *yawn* *stretch* *scratch*

After the Boot Camp race, Mr. W and I joined Vanessa and Jay at a nearby shopping outlet and had lunch, swapping stories and licking our flesh wounds. On top of bruises on both knees and down both shins, I was missing two strips of skin down the length of my left shin. I’d been dubious when Vanessa told me to wear pants, especially when I was in duo-layered jogging pants watching all these women walking around in cute tiny running shorts before the race. I pointed that out, and Vanessa whispered, “You’ll thank me later.” My GOD was she right. She said one girl was crying toward the end of the race, but I didn’t see her. Jay was amused at the guys who powered through the beginning of the race, showing off, as those were the same men who were hyperventillating and dying after the first obstacle, having run out of juice.

We did a little shopping, and Mr. W bought 3 tubs of protein powder at a VitaminWorld outlet. Jay bought a bottle of calcium supplements because the topic of milk products came up over lunch and he expressed emphatic distaste for milk, cheese, etc. and Mr. W said, “Really? Then where do you get your calcium from?” Jay had shrugged, and I told him that Asian (me) and black (him) people are genetically predisposed to osteoperosis, and it’s easier to pop a pill a day to stave off a later problem, than to have to take precribed medication or be hospitalized for brittle bones and broken hips later on in life. I’m a strong believer that it’s easier, more painless and cost-effective to prevent a problem than to have to fix a problem later on. So at VitaminWorld, Jay (with some more prompting from me) bought the bottle of calcium tabs.
When Mr. W and I were driving home, there was a bit of silence in the car, and Mr. W suddenly chuckled and said, “I wonder if Jay felt pressured to buy the calcium.”
“What?”
“I mean, he didn’t seem like he really wanted to get calcium until you said all that stuff outside the store.”
“I don’t CARE,” I said flatly. “I absolutely believe that he needs to be taking those calcium supplements and whether he felt pressure or not, I still think I may have saved him some big grief in the future. Besides, he can always NOT take them, and it only costs him like $6 bucks.” My dad’s a new osteoperosis victim and is taking prescribed medication for it. The medication is causing havoc on his liver and now he’s dealing with a liver issue on top of all this other problems, and trying to figure out how to balance medications so that he can get the effectiveness of one without counteracting with the side effects of another, and hoping the side effects of one or the other isn’t going to kill him instead. Being lactose intolerant like most Asians, I bet my dad wishes he’d just taken a calcium tablet once or twice a day in his youth.

But maybe that WAS too imposing of me for Jay, I mean, I HAD just met the guy for the first time that day… But he makes Vanessa happy, so he needs to stick around for as long as possible to keep doing that for my friend who is so loyal she didn’t leave me behind in the dust during a hard race when she was clearly physically able to have recovered and shaved minutes off her time had she just thought of herself before thinking of me.

The Marine Corps Boot Camp Challenge Obstacle Course kicked my ass. I was going to do a blog post where the title is “Marine Corps Boot Camp Challenge” and the body of the post is “I don’t want to talk about it.” That’s it. But Vicky told me to blog my experience because in the very least, I did it, I finished the course, and how many people could say that? “Uh, like a thousand this year,” I told her. =P Mr. W pointed out that of the thousand, there were many who finished after me, and even some who had to be taken care of by the paramedics on-site.

This was the worst race I’d ever run. I’ve felt bad in my own practice runs in the past, but I was never this far off the game in an actual race before, and that includes the Disneyland Half-Marathon that I ran without training for in which I developed a blood blister under a toenail and eventually ended up losing that nail. THIS race, I had to run while my period was going on. THIS race, I was anemic AND out-of-practice for after a week doing nothing in Hawaii. If you’re a distance runner you know about the first minutes of feeling like crap during a run, and then establishing and maintaining your rhythm where your body works efficiently with your breathing and you feel like you can run forever. I never got there in this race. After the first eighth of a mile, you hit three consecutive hay stacks you’re supposed to leap over as drill instructors yell at you to move it you lazy slow maggot. Mile two, you hit the obstacle courses all the way until you have about a half mile left of the race. The first obstacle was a series of hurdles, made of thick round logs and at a height of about my chin level, so I had to hurl myself over the top with one leg, swing my other leg over in a pirhouette and twirl off the log onto the next log, for about 5 consecutive logs. And then there were the over-under-over-under obstacles, and tunnel crawls. There’d be a 6-foot stack of logs you had to go over, then upon landing after jumping off, you run 5 feet to crawl under a cargo net as instructors scream at you to hurry up on the other side with encouraging words like, “Well you aren’t FIRST, let’s just put it THAT WAY! That’s great, just HOLD UP EVERYBODY ELSE! THAT’s a good strategy! When I talk to you I need to see your MOUTH OPEN IN A RESPONSE! It’s SIR YES SIR!” They pretty much didn’t pick on me, but one did yell at Vanessa, “TODAY, ladies, TODAY! Get OVER it, TODAY!” and with her Navy military training, she yelled back, “SIR, TODAY, SIR!” as I rolled my eyes at the drill instructor. Good thing he didn’t see me, I could only imagine what he would’ve said to me, considering this other time when one was yelling at another girl, Vanessa smiled and the DI caught her and ran next to her, yelling, “What are you smiling at? DO YOU FIND THIS FUNNY?!” “Sir, no, sir!”

It was a very, very humbling experience. I had an incapacitating pain in the midst of the course that felt like sharp cramps on either side of my stomach, and a few steps farther, the pain permeated my body and I felt it through to my back. I was afraid my kidneys were going to burst. All my organs were twisting inside of me. I had to slow to a walk as I gasped. Vanessa never left me. I remembered back to the beginning of the race, when we were standing by the start line after all the individual men had started and we were waiting for the individual women to start 15 minutes later. She turned to me and said, “If I die out there for ANY reason, keep going.” I’d told her, “If I die for any reason out there, call 9-1-1!” Little did I know how close I’d come, or so it felt.

Oh yeah. Fox holes. Deep holes in the ground, about 3 feet deep, 5 feet wide, you simply jump in and then jump back out the other side of and then continue on the course. There were water hoses and sprays, but no mud in the fox holes. The freakin easiest thing on the whole course was the pushup stations. You do 10 boy pushups (on toes) or 20 girl pushups (on knees). All the women around me did boy pushups cuz who wants to waste time doing 20 when you can do 10 and move on?

Vanessa’s boyfriend Jay and Mr. W kicked ass. They crossed the finish line together in about 25, 26 minutes. Vanessa mentally prepared me for a sprint-ending with “You ready? You ready?”, which we did and we turned the corner and burst through the finish line at full-on sprint when the clock read 45 minutes, so taking into account the 15-minute delay at the beginning of the race as they held all the individual women back to give the men a 15-minute lead, Vanessa and I did the 5K course in 30 minutes. Ouch.

I never did see Dwaine, tho, and as of right now, he’s still missing. I’ve left him a ton of voice mails on his phone and did not get a callback all weekend. =P

Via group e-mails this morning:

Mom: I just remember it is our anniversary yesterday.
Dad: LET’S CELEBRATE SAT OR SUN??
Me: OKAY! I was telling Mom that it seemed like yesterday that I celebrated your big anniversary with you last year. And that time goes by fast. So it must mean I’m old. Haha.
Dad: YOU ARE RIGHT IT IS YESTERDAY HOW CAN YOU REMEMBER. LOOK’S WHO’S OLD? HA HA. ANY PLAN ??
(He misunderstood me and the expression “seemed like yesterday.”)
Me: Let’s go for a nice dinner! Any place in particular you and mom want to eat?
Mom: No idea, any health food place? Can I also invite my mom?
Dad: every body may go. all welcome.
Me: Okay, I’m inviting my cat! Prepare to sneeze!
Dad: I know a pet shop near home.
(*Gasp* Did he just threaten to get rid of my cat?!)
Me: well, at least you didn’t say, “I know a restaurant that cooks cats.”
Mom: I know, I know, we can take DoDo to China.
(My parents are going on vacation to China in November.)
Me: Why? Dodo is from Italy.
Mom: Some place in China cook Cats.
(!!!)
Me: you’re TERRIBLE!

The confirmation e-mail sent by the Marine Corp for Saturday’s run has this paragraph in it:

‘THE COURSE: 3-mile run with obstacles throughout. Run is mostly flat. The obstacles range from hay bales to fox holes, to walls and tunnels with 60 drill instructors “encouraging” you along the course. View course map at www.bootcampchallenge.com.’

I find it funny that the word “encouraging” is in quotes, cuz Vanesssa said that she watched a drill sergeant run alongside a tired man last year at this event and scream in his ear, “You gonna let a woman beat you? What’s wrong with you? Where are your balls! Come on, you pussy! Run!” I’m gonna see if I can get more men yelled at this year by passing them. Hee hee.

“What’s a fox hole?” I asked my judge, former Navy.
“It’s a deep hole in the ground that soldiers dig to stay in when they’re out on the field,” my judge explained.
“Like a ditch?”
“No, a ditch is long. A fox hole fits one to four people.”
“Oh. There are foxholes on our obstacle course. I wonder what they’ll have us do with them, just jump in and jump out?”
“Well,” he said with a glint in his eye and an amused smile, “If it’s an event put on by the Marines, it will probably be a mud-filled fox hole.”
“It IS a Marine thing!” I wailed.

What do I wear?!

Remember the Marine Corps Boot Camp Challenge? It’s this Saturday morning. Here’s what we have been doing the last few days leading up to the event.

ME
Having spent the past week in Hawaii not hitting the gym, I cranked it up this week. During my lunchtime workouts, I’ve increased the weights (slightly) to strengthen myself, been incorporating runs and sprints into my warmups and cooldowns, doing “real” pushups in my circuits. I did the heavier legs stuff earlier on and then tapered off so that I wouldn’t be sore the day of the run.

MR. W
He did an early morning 4-mile run over the weekend to acclimate to the running conditions on the day of the race, and is hitting the gym again after his week off in Hawaii with me. He’d planned on doing some evening runs during the week.

VANESSA
She IMed with me on Wednesday:
me: So are you taking [your new boyfriend] to SD for the run?
Vanessa: He is going to do it to
me: as an individual or as a group?
Vanessa: ind
me: we’re all individuals.
Vanessa: he found out it was at the Recruit Depot and signed up
me: that’s what happened w/[Mr. W].
Vanessa: lol Marines!
me: that’s cool. I’m excited.
Vanessa: I’m excited too
me: when are you guys leaving for SD?
Vanessa: I dunno
me: are you staying down there?
Vanessa: He lives in San Clement so it’s close by
me: oh.
Vanessa: Maybe 6:45
Vanessa: i started going to the gym during my lunch breaks on M, W, F. I just started this week
me: oh, good for you.
Vanessa: Thanks!

I happen to know for a fact that her “date” (i.e. the new boyfriend, congrats, Vanessa!) for the event has been hitting the gym pretty hardcore lately, too.

DWAINE
we e-mailed Wednesday:
Me: Are ya ready? It’s this Saturday! 😀 Do you have a bunch of coworkers coming along?
Dwaine: I haven’t even thought about it. I haven’t run since the Mud Run. I probably shouldn’t finish this beer in my hand as part of my training.
Me: oh, finish it. It’s only wednesday. 🙂 (BTW, the angel on my other shoulder tells me to tell you that if you drop the beer, you’d be sober enough to work out tonite in preparation. It’s already Wednesday!)
Dwaine: tell the Angel on your shoulder that “I can quit when I went to!”
Me: “went to,” eh? Looks like you’re already one past quittin’ time. 😉
Dwaine: &*$@#!!!

(Reminder: rest mouse pointers on photos for captions. Yes, you have to.)

Our flight didn’t leave until 11:15p and our rental car wasn’t due till 10p, so we got a late checkout (5p) at the hotel, had an authentic island “spam” (they call it Portuguese sausage now, probably cuz Spam is a brand name) breakfast at a cute place by the water and hit another famous tourist spot, Captain Cook’s Monument off the coast. First, one thing about the restaurant. It’s known for its gecko residents. Greg told us on Tuesday that the geckos have learned to recognize the jam packets, and will come up to the table to give the preserved fruit a lick. Of COURSE we had to go for that. A gecko stopped by fairly soon after we sat down, but Mr. W scared it with his big camera, and despite the jam we set out on the sill, we never saw another one there.

While I turned around to look for other geckos, I spotted this furry little guy behind the open doorway.

On to the monument. Captain Cook (or as Mr. W calls him, Captain Hook) is the “discoverer” of Australia and the Hawaiian Islands. The reason “discoverer” is in quotes is because when Mr. W read the monument plaque to me, I said, “Wasn’t there already people on the island when he got there?” Anyway, the monument is a white vertical spike-looking thing set up where he first landed on the Big Island and near where he later “fell.” The reason why “fell” is in quotes is because it’s really the place where the Hawaiian natives took him out. As in, navigate to the bright light, Cap’n! Navigate toward the light.

In order to get to the monument, we either have to hike down a steep grade jungle-y mountainside for miles (ick, mosquitoes!) or kayak there from about 1-2 miles away. We opted to kayak, and rented a 2-man plastic kayak for $40 for the entire day. It was a beautiful watery trip, and the clear teal ocean was so full of life that I was afraid I’d hit a fish upside the head when my oar dipped in. We didn’t cause any fish this pain (that I know of), but my body did not escape the soreness. There just wasn’t enough blood in my deltoids and I had to take a few pauses and wait for sensation to return. Any guilt I may have had about not having any upper body workout for the past week was obliterated.

We “parked” our kayak (what’s the proper term for that? “dragged to rocky coast?”) near the monument and jumped into the warm water for some amazing snorkeling. The coral reef in that area is expansive and beautiful. Mr. W had purchased some 35mm underwater cameras and we both went thru our 27-some shots in less than half an hour. I even saw some ancient petroglyphs on a rock underwater but the photos didn’t come out too well.

There were many different fish, and I loved hearing the colorful parrotfish munch on the coral.

Whenever I’d drift by and hear the “chomp chomp” scraping sound, I’d look all around and try to find the coral munching fish. Man, fish are constantly eating down there! What a bunch of piggies.

Mr. W found it remarkable that he wanted out of the water before I did cuz he says usually whomever he snorkels with wants out way before he’s willing to get out. That day, once he said he wanted to go, I tried to swim over to the kayak and get out of the water, but I kept getting distracted by stuff like this.

A few times a huge swarm of hundreds of thousands of baby silvery fish swam up to me and they’d split to go around me, and rejoin behind me. At one point I had a cloud of silver swirling all around me and I kept spinning to see them all, sparkling in the sunlight like liquid mercury drops. Like a big spillover of silver stars. Like that one scene where the bad cop explodes into a million cold quicksilver droplets floating in the air in the Terminator 4-D show at Universal Studios. (graphic, huh?)

Wanna see that again but slower?

Our photos spent along with our energy, we rowed back toward the other bay where we were parked. For some reason, I turned around and looked behind me. And saw small triangular black fins sticking out of water in the bay we had just left. Spinner dolphins! We quickly turned the kayak around and rowed back so fast we passed other kayakers like they were standing still. There were probably 20+ dolphins in the school, and they were doing mating shows, smacking their tails against the water surface, leaping into the air in teams. One dolphin demonstarted why they’re called spinner dolphins. He leapt high into the air and spiraled the entire arc until he hit water again, like how a football spins if thrown correctly. But faster. And he jumped back out and did it again as the onlookers cheered and clapped. And a third consecutive jump. Mr. W hurriedly put on his mask, snorkel and fins and jumped in the water and got to swim with the dolphins. He said they swam deliberately slowly underwater around him to wait for him, a whole family with a baby. After he got back on the kayak I tried to do the same but at this point, the dolphins were at a different spot and the water had poor visibility so I could only see them if I had my head out of the water and could spot their fins. I only saw them in the water when 4 or 5 swam in a downward arc about 10 feet underneath me. We cursed the moments we used up all our films on stupid fish.

After getting out and returning the kayak, we hit up Costco and dropped our film off for 1-hour processing, and went back to the hotel to clean up, pack and check out. Our swimsuits and towels were too wet and sticky with ocean saline to pack, so I did a load of laundry at the hotel’s outdoor facility while I chatted with an Oklahoma woman on vacation there who saw my UCLA travel wallet and had to comment that her husband’s also a Bruin. She loaned me her laundry detergent so that I didn’t have to buy a box, and I gave her the remaining half bottle of our dark Maui rum since she was staying another day past us, and she told me about her family as we played with cute little geckos. Small brown furry ferrets or meerkats or mongoose or something frolicked on the lawn, too.

Then we had a nice seafood dinner (well, I had a fresh-caught ono wrap while Mr. W had a bleu cheese burger) back in Kailua-Kona town in an outdoor patio overlooking the ocean, walking distance from our hotel, walked through town visiting some more shops, and then went to return the car (a great experience, the streets and directions were perfectly labeled street-side and visible despite the late hour, and the Hertz return guy came out to us and checked the car, then took instant payment right there and printed the receipt from a portable hand-held machine he had in his hand, we never had to go in) and shuttled over to the airport. Where I slept waiting for the flight to come in (about 2 hours) and slept immediately on the plane through all of the 4+ hour flight home.