cindy's world

Hooray! I made it through all my scheduled days of work without incident, and am starting maternity leave after today! With a due date of 11/21 (11 days away) and a clairvoyantly-predicted delivery date of 11/13ish (3 days away, eek!), I know I really pushed it. But I had wanted as many days home as I could after Allie comes out, not sitting around watching TV while she incubates in here. I figured early on in my pregnancy, since I wasn’t very affected by all the pregnancy symptoms people complain about (my hair texture/thickness didn’t even change, altho I think my skin actually got clearer thanks to a lack of PMS the past 10 months), that I could work until as close to the end of my pregnancy as I dared. Looking back, the worst of it all was just the nausea that my occasional not eating well induced in the first trimester (not that I ever threw up), and the current finger joint pain and upper abdominal pain (caused by Allie’s recent favorite places to lodge her foot while I was sleeping) I’d wake up with.

Until last nite. I’d been having random minor lower abdominal cramps, feeling like menstrual cramps. I would give it a 2 on the pain scale — annoying and distracting but not rising to any caliber where I’d even be concerned with it. But last nite as I tried to sleep, these cramps were persistent, strong, and joined by lower back pain. Half-awake, I thought to myself that if this continued, I wasn’t sure if I could make it to my last scheduled day of work in the morning. At some point, everything subsided and I fell easily into sleep until the morning. I did dream that I had these awful sensations at work and had to leave early. (I still think that if I have to deal with the stresses of work in my dreams, I oughta get overtime.) I remember saying to Mr. W in the midst of these cramps, “I think she’s coming this weekend, if not tomorrow.”

Yesterday at work, I was in the restroom and studied my engorged-looking tummy in the mirror. That old Ambrosia song popped into my head and I thought, looking at the giant bump, “…she IS the ‘Biggest Part of Me.’ ” I googled the lyrics, and yup, looks appropriate when you think about it being applied to my baby girl. I think this’ll be our song.

BIGGEST PART OF ME – Ambrosia

Sunrise, there’s a new sun arisin’
In your eyes, I can see a new horizon
Realize, that will keep me realizin’
You’re the biggest part of me

Stay the night, Need your lovin’ here beside me
Shine the light, Need you close enough to guide me
For all my life, I’ve been hopin’ you would find me
You’re the biggest part of me

(Chorus:)
Well, make a wish, baby
Well and I will make it come true
Make a list, baby
Of the things I’ll do for you
Ain’t no risk now
In lettin’ my love rain down on you
So we could wash away the past
So that we may start anew

Rainbow, risin’ over my shoulder
Love flows, gettin’ better as we’re older
All I know, all I want to do is hold her
She’s the life that breathes in me
Forever, got a feelin’ that forever
Together, we are gonna stay together
For better, for me there’s nothin’ better
You’re the biggest part of me

(Chorus)

More than an easy feelin’
She brings joy to me
How can I tell you what it means to me
Flow like a lazy river
For an eternity
I’ve finally found someone who believes in me
And I’ll never leave

Oh, not to doubt now
Mmmm, make life grand

(Chorus)

Beside me, need your lovin’ here beside me
To guide me, keep it close enough to guide me
Inside of me, from the fears that are inside of me
You’re the biggest part of me

Forever, got a feelin’ that forever
Together, we are gonna stay together
Forever, from now until forever
You’re the biggest part of me
You’re the life that breathes in me
You’re the biggest part of me

You changed my life
You made it right
And I’ll be a servant to you
For the rest of my life
You’re the biggest part of me

(she IS the life that breathes and hiccups in me, and I’m sure she’ll make me her servant for long to come. )

A judge from my building, running into Mr. W: “Hey, I just saw your wife this morning. She’s looking pretty big. What is this, she gets married and lets herself go?” I work with goofballs.

I had my 38-week checkup with the OB Tuesday afternoon. Ultrasound revealed that Allie is still in the proper position — head down, laying on her side. Size looks good, the doctor still expects her to be within 7 lbs at due date. Good amount of amniotic fluid around her. Heartrate at approximately 130 bpm. My blood pressure looks good (105/70), and I’ve been steadily gaining about a pound a week so now I’m still right about at a 30-lb gain. Allie’s been active, altho now that there’s less room, there’s less nudging and more squirming. Often a foot will slide from my left upper ab to my right upper ab, and I’d get a hip check right under that. “Would you like me to check if you’re dilated?” he asked. Sure! I’m curious.

That manual check wasn’t comfortable. I involuntarily sputtered, “Ow!” He told me to take a deep breath and let it out slowly, and I did. It didn’t take long. So I’m 65%-70% effaced, but not dilated (normal to have only effacement first with a later dilation in first time pregnancies, he said). I asked him how he could tell the effacement by feel, and he said he could push up against the cervix and feel Allie’s head, and that her head is at -1 station. He said I’ve lost most of my mucus plug already, and that most women don’t lose it like a one-time plug falling out; they’d merely get thick discharge mixing into their already more frequent discharge. I’d expected to see some traces of blood when I lost my plug (which word, btw, is totally misleading), so I was a little surprised. He said some minor spotting is normal after a cervical check, but if I get blood-blood like a menstrual period, to call labor & delivery.
“You’re ahead of other women on a first pregnancy, but I’d still say to expect a due-date delivery. You can always have her early and prove me wrong,” he said with a smile. He offered to “sweep [my] membranes” at my next checkup (Nov 17) to encourage labor starting if I’d like. I actually don’t even expect to make that appointment, given what Rebecca has always said.

Rebecca, as of the evening after the appointment, still saw Allie arriving “around or by the 13th.”

I fell asleep early quite accidentally, but awoke around 9:30 p.m. thanks to a smack on the cheek delivered by Mr. W in his sleep. I felt some discharge leakage, which has become rather commonplace in my 3rd trimester. I wobbled to the restroom, which has also become very commonplace lately, especially after Allie made her 2nd drop this weekend. It looks like the rest of the mucus plug came out in that leakage. Nothing too exciting or different from what I had been discharging, except for the color being like that of old blood. I called out to Mr. W that the mucus plug came out, and he said groggily, “So what does that mean?”
“Nothing. Just that there’s some progress. And that Rebecca is more right than the doctor.” I soon heard snoring from the bedroom again. Meanwhile, I took a nice hot shower. I kept seeing the 10th in my head in my shower, so I thought I’d figure out what day that is. Thursday. My last day of work before scheduled maternity leave. I don’t expect any action anytime soon, so I hope to have an uneventful next few days at least until I’m off on maternity leave.

For the billionth consecutive post about Allie (or so it seems)…

She’s 37 weeks today, which means she’s reached full term! Yay! I had a short and sweet OB visit this morning before work. I’m at 154 lbs, which I found rather disturbing, but the OB of all people wasn’t concerned. Almost as a pre-emptive excuse, when the doctor walked in and asked how the baby and I are, I told him she seems to be growing by leaps and bounds to the point where it’s noticeable every few days (not a lie). He said cavalierly, “Well, they’ll do that to ya at this point.” He measured my bump (such an understatement) and said it’s right on par with where it’s supposed to be (within 3 cm of the # of weeks gestation). He did an ultrasound and noted she’s head-down on her side, which is how she was orientated last check-up, and that her bladder’s full and “right about to pee.” I asked when I can expect her to do the last quarter-turn to be face-down, how the birthing class said is the position we want the baby to be born in. He explained, “We want her on her side right now. She’ll make that last turn herself to get out while you’re in labor.” Oh! She’s not a procrastinator. She’s been in that position for about a month now. He said what I had experienced last week mid-walk was likely a contraction, and that the rock-hard tightening of my stomach that I’ve felt (with my fingers) fairly often lately, which comes without any pain or much sensation, is the Braxton Hicks. As for the bumps and pokes I’ve felt on top near my diaphram, those are “booty-bumps” and she’s also got her right foot up there. I asked if he could tell how big she was at this point, and he said if they have a concern about the baby’s size at this point, they’d refer the patient to radiology for a proper measurement, but since everything measures within normal ranges, he expects her to be in the high 6 lbs, low 7 lbs at her due date. “Just where you wanted her to be,” I remembered.
As he helped me sit up, he said, “You’re at about 30 pounds right now?”
“I’m right about at 30, yes.”
“That’s good. I think you’re doing a good job in keep your weight where it should be, and she’s at the right size. Just keep up with the walks, keep your weight pretty much where it is, and you’re fine.” He shook my hand and smiled at me. Whoa, did he tell me 30 is okay? Is this Halloween today or April Fool’s Day? I thanked him went on my way to work.

Rebecca was at the coffee shop yesterday, so I asked her for a “date update.”
She said, “Did I tell you before about the 7th?”
I replied, “You’d initially said 13th, 14th, but then later on you said as early as the 7th to as late as the 23rd.”
Later on, as we walked with her to her car/office, she checked again and said, “I’m still seeing 13th, 14th.”

I guess Allie’s gonna be early. Yay! It also explains the oddities I experienced yesterday. Mr. W and I walked to a few nearby stores to run some errands in the morning. While inside one of them, I started getting a little bit of the sick feeling I’d get when my blood pressure drops and my vision is about to black out. I looked around for some place to sit, but of course there was none. I started taking deep deliberate breaths. Mr. W asked me what was going on and I told him I feel sick and need to sit. My lower back had been sore for maybe 15 minutes at that point, too. He grasped my arm and walked me to the front of the store, and by then the sensations faded so I was fine. We left the store, walked toward the next one (in the direction of home) and as I stood waiting for the pedestrian walk sign to turn at the intersection, I suddenly felt like I couldn’t catch my breath. I stood there, panting, as odd uncomfortable cramp-like sensations hit the top of my stomach, just under the ribs. “I don’t think this is her doing it,” I said, pushing at the hardness, as cold sweats started coming and I started getting light-headed again. That faded in less than half a minute, and we went into the next store. While in there, looking for wallpaper glue for the border in Allie’s room, I got light-headed again and leaned against the side of a shelf and tried to breathe slowly to not hyperventillate, holding my breath between inhales. That soon faded, too, and we went home. I drank a glass of water, laid down, and fell asleep. I hadn’t felt that tired since I was pregnant. So, I’m thinking it was Braxton Hicks.

We’d better pack our bag!

Wednesday (yesterday), I had my third chiropractor appointment. I started getting a pinched nerve type of pain on my lower left back about 6 weeks ago, and with every step, I would get a shock of pain. It got so bad that I started thinking maybe it was a sciatica problem, and if I weren’t pregnant I’d twist my back and try to crack it, but since I was, I couldn’t do that motion. I suddenly remembered that I’d met a chiropractor in the super-duper gym’s locker one in the early months of my pregnancy, and she’d given me her card after we’d chatted (technically, she gave me her nail file, which had her practice’s information printed on it).

I looked up her number and called, and she hadn’t planned to go into her office that afternoon, but knowing I was in such pain and remembering me from the gym, she specially went in, met up with me, and had a 2-hour initial consult/treatment. She HEALED the pain with that one visit. There were other little issues that I didn’t know was spine/nerve-related that she pinpointed and treated, also, so I’ve been back weekly for 3 sessions as the weight of the pregnancy gave me more back issues. I was so impressed with her I bought a 10-package session. She also teaches a nutrition college course, I know she works out religiously, and she’s very educational and chatty when we meet, so I knew I’d found the right person for me. Before that, I’d never wanted to go to a chiropractor cuz the crazy cracking adjustments gave me the heebie jeebies. She uses a gentle micro-adjustment tool that “taps” the misaligned vertebrae into place, so I was more comfortable after experiencing that. Oh, and she’s also been trained in some pregnancy something-or-other method for her practice. So if anyone wants an awesome chiro and is willing to drive to Fountain Valley, let me know!

I’ve had a good-busy week so far (as opposed to bad-busy), starting from last Saturday, when Ann threw me the classiest, most beautiful baby shower ever with about 15 of my closest friends and family at her beautiful new house. It was in the traditional non-co-ed style, or she would’ve had to find a bigger venue elsewhere. I discovered while putting together the guest list that I have WAY more male friends than female. We’ll have to use THAT guest list for something else later on. It was great seeing people I haven’t seen for a long time. That’s one of the cool things about celebratory events: it gets (most) people together in a jolly mood to celebrate. My parents-in-law and sister-in law (Gamer Bro’s wife) even drove down from Vegas and spent the weekend with us to attend the shower. I’ll post photos when I get a moment to sit down in front of the computer and compile photos. My mom sent me a slew of photos she’d taken the same night. I’m hoping others will process and make their photos available soon, so I can steal some. (How did we ever survive without digital photos and the internet?)

Vanessa was out of town on the weekend of the shower, but still wanted to celebrate with me, so we met up on Monday at The Melting Pot in Brea. It was her first time there, but she did great with the fondue dinner. This was also the first time I’ve seen her since she’d gotten engaged, so there was lots to talk about. Like, how she’s planning on making Allie a little playmate in 4 years. Yay! It’s funny when I think back to how early on in this blog, when I’d first met her in jujitsu, I’d referred to her as Navy Girl Vanessa to give her some form of identity. I’d also called Ann “Commenter Ann” or “Commenter A,” because that was how we interacted in the beginning — she commented on this blog. And now the both of them have larger-than-life presence and their names alone hold enough meaning and identity to be simply “Vanessa” and “Ann.” Meet my friends, Vanessa and Ann. Of course you know them, I talk about them on the blog.

Tuesday was supposed to be my down-day of the week. I’d planned to do my laundry and get the photos organized to post on the shower. However, one load of laundry in, and the washing machine gave out on me. It refused to spin or drain, so my clothes were just sitting in a vat of dirty water. I turned the dial back a bit and re-ran the last portion of the prior cycle. That worked, but the darn machine stopped again when it got to the same point of the wash.
Mr. W had just received a phone call days before from his tenant describing the exact same problem with the washer at the rental place and Mr. W had given the tenant permission to call a repair guy over and fix the problem on Mr. W’s tab. Mr. W was understandably concerned with how much it was going to cost him, and now this was happening at our house, too. After an initial freak-out period where he exercised his yelling, cussing, hitting and kicking muscles, Mr. W went online to see if he could troubleshoot and find a decent fix. Turns out this is a common problem and most of the time, the issue is the lid switch. In the next half hour, Mr. W took the washing machine apart, found the problem with the lid switch, and FIXED it! We have a working washing machine again!
Of course now it was too late to do the rest of my laundry loads, but it does show one thing: there’s a reason for everything. “WHAT ARE THE ODDS of this !@#$ happening AT THE SAME TIME as the !@#$ at the condo?!” Mr. W had lamented. “WHY would this happen to everybody?!” Apparently, it was to answer his prayer about having to spend hundreds on getting a professional out to fix his tenants’ washing machine. I encouraged him to contact his tenants to see if they’d gotten someone to fix their machine yet, and if not, to see if we (Mr. W) can go over and do it ourselves (himself).
He texted his tenant the next day, turned out the tenant hadn’t gotten anyone yet, so after work and my chiropractor appointment yesterday (Wednesday), we went to Mr. W’s rental property and he FIXED THAT WASHER, TOO! Same part, same problem. On the drive home Mr. W spoke of how he didn’t have the confidence to attempt to fix a washer at someone else’s home, but because it had happened at our home, he was okay to attempt it first on his own. That then gave him the experience and confidence to try it at the tenants’ place. The total cost for the repair at the tenants: $45 for a new lid switch. They were happy, we were happy. I was happy cuz while Mr. W was spending half an hour doing the fix, I hung out with the tenants’ two very nice young adult daughters and played with their two cats.

Today, childhood friend Sandy (she still needs that title to distinguish her from coworker Sandy) and I had made plans to meet up. She moved to Texas about a year and a half ago, and I hadn’t seen her since. She flew back to CA to attend my shower and was staying a week, so we wanted to take advantage of the opportunity of being in the same state, and she wanted to come visit Dodo. Because I’ve known her from age 6, I figure she won’t find it rude if I do the rest of my laundry while she visits.

Just got back from my 29-week prenatal appointment. Seems like just a couple of weeks ago that I was there, can’t believe it’s been a month. Mr. W came with me this time.

After my giant weight leap in the 2nd trimester (seemed like 10+ lbs overnight), I was scared to get on the scale at the nurse’s station, but I weighed in less than 2 pounds more than I did a month ago, so that was a relief. The OB said my total weight gain at this point is about 20 lbs, give or take, depending on what I consider my starting weight to be. He still wants me to stay within 25 lbs total, but didn’t give me a lecture or anything this time. He said in Japan, they’re “really strict” and put the max weight gain at 10kg (22 lbs), that’s it. Okay, but their babies aren’t sharing genes with a 6ft+ white guy. Having gone thru the second half of my second tri where the weight just flew on without my having changed my lifestyle habits, I feel like it’s a little out of my control, so I wonder how Japanese doctors enforce their “strict” weight gain guidelines.

My stomach measured normal (by tape measure), and the OB was FINALLY able to confirm on ultrasound that Allie’s an Allie and not a Riley. She’s upside-down in me right now, feet at my ribs (which explains the multi-directional tapping I’ve been getting at both my sides, near my ribs, simultaneously). He focused in on her face and we got a really clear view. She’s sooo cute right now! She’s got these big round eyes, and as we watched, she blinked at us (“WOW! I can’t believe we can see that!” Mr. W said excitedly), then moved one fist up to her face (I felt a little jolt in my abdomen when she did that), opened and closed her mouth, made a sucking motion with her jaw, and then squeezed her eyes shut. “She looks like mom,” the OB said.
“Really? Don’t all babies look exactly the same on ultrasound at this stage?” I asked.
“No, not really,” the doctor said. Hmm. Maybe she DOES look like me. Mr. W said the doctor was joking.

I also got my whooping cough vaccination today, because the doctor said the baby would benefit immediately from the antibodies I make. He strongly encouraged everyone who would come in contact with Allie to get whooping cough vaccinations, because there’s a surge in cases and pertussis could kill an infant. I told him that the Stepkidlet had just told us that a few days ago and encouraged us all to get whooping cough vaccinations. “You have a smart daughter,” the OB told Mr. W. (Mr. W is soon to have TWO smart daughters.)

A few minutes ago…
Me: I wish we’d taken a video of the ultrasound today.
Mr. W: Yeah. I didn’t know it’d be that good.
Me: Haha, it’s NOT ‘that good’; all she did was blink and suck her thumb.
Mr. W: Yeah…that was pretty amazing.

Too bad I can’t take her out early, play with her, and then put her back in. (“But then it’ll be all messy and bloody,” gross hubby pointed out.)

Signs that the Universe wants you to take better care of yourself:

I found myself invited to an amazing birthday spread this morning on behalf of the judge next door. Some of my favorite things were there: lemon meringue pie, chocolate silk pie, chocolate cake, tiramisu in individual cups. But today after work is when I’d planned to have my gestational diabetes test. *sigh* I had some provolone cheese with 2 crackers, some grapes, orange juice, and half a bagel instead.

My lunch at California Pizza Kitchen (spinach & mushroom flatbread) came with a soup or a salad. I knew I should order salad, but ordered some sort of cream soup instead. The waiter brought me the salad anyway, and not the soup. So I just asked for some dressing on the side and used it sparingly. *sigh*

I just got back from the OB. It’s pretty obvious now that I’m going to blow the 24-lb limit. If we use my one-time abnormally low weigh-in as the starting weight (120), which is on my OB’s record, then I’ve gained 19 lbs as of this morning’s visit. If we use the highest weight recorded by Kaiser within the few months before I got pregnant (127), then I’ve gained 12. Either way, with a whole 14 more weeks to go before delivery date, there’s no way I’m only gonna gain another 5-12 lbs in that time.

My OB brought up the point that my build/genetics isn’t designed to comfortably carry and birth a large child, but since Allie’s father is “a strapping tall Caucasian man,” and we can’t alter either party’s genetics, the only thing I’m able to do to help make delivery uncomplicated as far as baby size is concerned is to mitigate weight gain. He said ideally the baby’s weight would be in the high 6s, low 7s (lbs) at birth.

On the brighter side of things, Allie looks “happy” and “healthy” on her ultrasound. I asked my OB if he could confirm her gender before we buy too many girl items. He tried, but Allie was laying on her side with her legs in a semi-Buddha pose so that one foot clearly and completely blocked her genitals and we couldn’t see anything there. The doctor thought the position was a little odd, saying “that’s weird, it’s not quite cross-legged,” but it makes sense to me cuz I’ve laid that way comfortably since childhood, with the lower leg’s foot propped up on the upper leg’s raised knee. (Mr. W once called it weird, too, when he walked in on me lounging that way on the bed.) Maybe this means Allie and I can do yoga together, I dunno.

Other random stuff I learned about being pregnant:
* It’s not that my boobs are sagging; it’s that the stomach is now rising to meet them. =P
* Moving around during the day lulls the baby to sleep with the assistance of the amniotic fluid, but when I’m laying motionless at night, she wakes up in the stillness well-rested and full of energy to play and dance. Rocking myself to and fro on my side lulls her back to sleep.
* People see what they want to see when they look at me. Just about everyone complains I’m “teeny tiny,” barely showing, especially when looking at me straight-on or from behind. This could be because they expect/want to see me looking very obviously pregnant at 6.5 months along. I’ve seen photos of friends’ friends who at this point have their bellies extended way beyond their breasts, belly button popped out (neither is true for me, and I’m still smaller than some coworkers who are not pregnant). But there were 2 people, a female coworker and our pilates instructor, who both said that it’s obvious I’m carrying a girl because I’m very wide out the sides and back. The two accounts are contradictory. *shrug*

Sometime this week, Allie decided to have a growth spurt. Not only does my stomach feel tight the moment I eat a bit of food, but her movements are so distinct and coordinated that I now know she’s a night owl like her mommy (“owl” in Mandarin, by the way, literally translates to “cat-headed hawk”). She’d wake me up dancing at around 3am. If I curled up in fetal position, she’d waste no time in tapping against each of my quads (with perfect aim, one thigh after the other) until I lowered my legs and gave her extra space. I wish a fetal psychologist could tell me whether she’s tapping me in play (Mr. W: “Like how if you put your hand up on the glass, a monkey would put up its hand to match yours”), or being a spoiled brat and pushing away anything that infringes on her personal space. I tend to think it’s the latter, cuz she pushes away anything — my arm, the stethoscope head, my purse, my magazine, the pillow. Oh well, good thing I’m always up at night anyway cuz I sleep like a donut (with a hole in the middle), and Dodo does his territorial yowling thing around the same time as Allie’s dancing (they’re on the same schedule), so looks like the three of us will be up together often.

For the past 3 days, if I ate a normal-sized meal, I’d feel like I want to burst. I also would have trouble getting air into my lungs, but gasping repeatedly for air hurt my abdominal muscles and would give me minor sharp cramping sensations all over the area between my belly button and my ribcage. I remembered learning that at this point, the stomach is pushed up into my diaphragm and cramped, so anything more than a small meal IS very hard on my upper abdominal muscles/lungs/diaphragm. I finished a meal at dinner with hubby and the stepkidlet this evening (she’s back from Haiti now, armed with photos, stories, inspiration, and appreciation for life), and wobbled away from the table, gasping for air, thinking that if something accidentally went into my mouth now, my stomach would explode and Allie would fall out onto the floor. Mental note: no more full meals; stomach capacity has shrunken this week due to increase of uterus size.

People have been asking me for Allison’s middle name, and I tell them it’s undecided. Mr. W decided unilaterally today that it should be Allison Catherine. Why? Allie Cat. “Don’t do that to her!” Stepkidlet said. Coincidentally (or unfortunately), while we were shopping for my cousin Jennifer’s baby shower gift earlier in the week, I bought a really cute cat ensemble for Allie.

Allie’s wardrobe is growing…she got some cute onesies from her Auntie Jordan in Florida, and yesterday, I received a strange package in a manila envelope through courtmail. Turned out it contained a cute little ruffle dress with matching bloomers from her Auntie Erin in Beverly Hills Court. Thanks, Aunties! Now, I just need some place to put Allie’s stuff until we replace the guest room with her room.